Naked People and Bears.

So you know its going to be a fun day when you receive a call about a naked guy jacking off 4.5 minutes from your house. Yup, that's what happened to me today. Then 6-7ish officers proceeded to try and catch naked guy and get him to put some clothes on and get a girlfriend or something. Yea...he's still at large.....my doors are locked and I'm going over to Daddy's later to pick up the shotgun. 

New call. Neighbor gets in fight with other neighbor about neighbor b playing loud music at 4am, neighbor a and neighbor b begin to fight and fall down stairs, neighbor b is naked. So clothed and pissed neighbor rolls down stairs and fights with another naked man[clearly these were men women just do not fight other naked women unless there is a man invovled] what a great day in Gotham.

BOLO[be on lookout for] Bear in ******area....use caution and if located do not feed the bear. Yea. That really happened and yea it had the part about feeding the bear in it.

Foot Pursuits. Gotta love 'em. Love them even more when the officer keys up on his radio to say "subject in custody" and doesn't let go of the button before yelling "don't freaking move!".

Me: District 6 did you want me to leave you on this call or free you and mark you at your current location?

District 6: 10-4

...........i mean really????